What are your thoughts on a man or woman leaving their current relationship to begin another? You may think that it is a cowardly way to deal with real life issues that are in your present relationship. But for the most part, your mate believes the “grass is greener on the other side” if they can somehow get into the new relationship. The end result can be a good thing or a bad thing. When it turns out to be a negative result of what you expected, it is called the 80/20 rule. You give up a relationship with someone who is 80% effectively satisfying your needs for someone who ends up satisfying you only 20% of the time.
Let’s say your spouse does something really annoying to you or perhaps puts your family in a financial bind. To you, whatever they’re currently doing to wreak havoc in your relationship is making you emotionally and physically irritated. In your mind, the best resolution is to switch out mates and make your life easier. It is best to leave your current spouse/mate for someone else who may handle business, household finances, and your relationship in a totally different manner than your current mate.
Unfortunately, the 80/20 rule can be a blessing or a curse. Eighty percent of what your current mate does is effective for you and you’re feeling a void in the other twenty percent of your relationship. If you feel the grass is greener on the other side, then you’ll begin to wander off helplessly to find satisfaction. What if when you get to that new relationship, your new mate doesn’t pay bills like your first spouse? What if they dislike cooking and cleaning unlike your first spouse? What if they make you do all the work in the relationship or there’s no equality in decision making? These are things to consider. Rather than dealing with the tough situations you had with your previous mate, you chose to just find someone new. Your current spouse of 80% allowed you to leave him/her so that you can fill the 20% void in your life, but if the new mate is not up to par, you’re now at a disadvantage. You’ve traded a wife/husband who fulfilled the majority of your needs for someone who may be less than effective.
Bottom line is that you have to be careful for what you wish. Sometimes the relationship will require you to put in work and make an effort. What you fear the most from happening in your relationship may be what you need to tackle head on. You may find out in the end that the very thing you’re afraid of is what will become your blessing.
Spiritual Disclaimer: Individual results vary. Not every bad relationship will end in divorce. Not every romantic relationship will result in marriage. However, you won’t know unless you step out on faith.